So, this weekend, after me and my hubby made love, I started thinking. We have all seen slow motion video, is it possible to make slow motion written stories? I have decided to do two things. First, I want to show you how I write a story, from beginning to end. Second, I want to try to turn a single, shortish love making session, into a full story.
First, we have this, the different activities. These are simply the events that occurred, with little description, to go through the event sequence. You can look over this to see what happened during the love making session, and see how I start planning how to write the story. I plan to show step by step so that by the end of the week, I will have the whole story written, in hopefully delicious language we can all sit back and imagine happening, step by step.
In bed, me in nightie + panties, him in boxers
Legs intertwine
Him on side, put leg over mine
Kiss cheek
Put hand on opposite cheek, pull face towards me
Lips light touch, back, light touch
His tongue out, light lick on lips, light lick again
Press lips against, light press
Lip to lip
I kiss his bottom lip
Our lips press together, firmer
Lips part slightly
Tongues touch, tip to tip
his tongue probes my lip, around the top then bottom lip
My tongue probes into his mouth, slightly
tongue licks tongue middle
Tongue licks tongue side
tongues twist around each other
His tongue leaves
Sucks my lower lip into mouth
lets go of lip, kisses below lip
Kisses chin
mouth moves to neck
kisses neck
lick neck
suck neck, what does it feel like?
nibbles neck
mouth to ear, nibble earlobe
heavy breath in ear
can't move, electric tingles
claw his back slightly
mouth moved back to neck as I run hands up and down back
kiss moves to shoulder
Teeth bite nightie strap, pull off shoulder
moved to collar bone going across to other shoulder
bites other strap, pulls down
nightie falls down slightly, barely being held up by body pressed to body
mouth moves to chest, above breasts
kisses all over check, my hands tangled in his hair
he pulls nightie, falls further, exposing breasts
Kisses move to top of breast, side to side
Breast cupped, thumbs stroke nipples
Mouth moves to nipple, while other hand, fingers pinch opposite nipple
Mouth moved to stomach, hands squeeze breasts
push nighty up, I take off
licks belly button, running tongue inside
Hands leave breasts, moving to waist
panties pulled off
Knees pulled apart, mouth moved to pubis
Hands moved under, grasping ass cheeks
mouth moves to pussy, kissing outside lips
tongue pushes into pussy, fingers move up to top, arm around leg, rubbing above clit
mouth moved away, other hand fingers inserted in pussy
fingers rub top of vagina, g-spot, other fingers work clit
Rubbed until climax, tighten up
tongue back down, licking pussy opening until very wet with tongue and pussy juices
hips moved up, penis head placed against pussy
legs pulled up, ass slightly above bed
legs spread, opening pussy wide
head rubbed against outside pussy lips
worked inside pussy, head barely in, slight push in, pull back, push in, deeper each time until penis all the way in pussy
legs placed over shoulders
penis pulled out until head barely in, then pushed in all the way to base of shaft
Continue slow removal until head barely in, followed by push in to base of shaft
Faster movements, slapping sound where his sides hit spread legs
Pushes as far in as he can go, then moves legs to side
Arms wrapped around torso, like hug
Lifts up, his ass resting on feet, me on top
sucks nipple, I ride
Arms still around me, holding me to him
Move my hips first up and down, then back and forth
Start moving circles
more frantic, moved hips back and forth faster
soon almost pop out, riding hard, until climax
lays me down
kisses
tongues motionless, breathing hard into each others mouths
His hips move slowly at first, picking up speed
slap of stomach to stomach, sides to legs, movements faster
thrusts shorten, speed up, pounding into me
His body jerks slightly
thrust again a couple more times, jerk
cums into pussy
Stops moving, holds me
penis getting soft, stays in until completely soft, falls out
plays with nipples and kisses until soft penis pops out
feel cum leaking out, down perineum, into ass crack
He gets up, goes to shower to wash
comes back, kisses me
Cum leaks down leg
I go to shower, wash
water first down ass crack, wash cum from there
Open pussy slightly, run water inside
water over pussy surface, then down legs
Go back to bed, lay down, cuddle until he sleeps then I turn over, go to sleep
You call this the beginning of a slow motion love session, and the first thing that springs to my mind is how detailed just the list is. In fact, I think about it like this, it's like sex poetry. Like freestyle sex poetry. I know you're on the way to creating a flowing, erotic, image-rich and luxurious slow motion lovemaking session, but I find myself thinking about an even more stripped down version of the list turned into an Alan Ginsberg beat poetry version of zen erotic sex.
ReplyDeleteFrom another standpoint, as you know, I revel in the autobiographical nature of your writing from a vicariously voyeuristic perspective, and the detail in your list, while clinical, is clear and intimate, and arousing almost as if watching this unfold before me. ;)
I have tried writing poetry, but I admit, I am not the greatest at it. The only one I consider good, most others seem to not like as much, maybe because it was about me contemplating suicide.
DeleteCan no one hear me scream
In this world so cold
Our childhood ripped away
Before our time grown old
Alone, abandoned am I
In this world of pain
Slowly feel the void
Eating all that's sane
Darkness washes over me
Clings to me like death
take my life and end this pain
With my one last breath
In this world so cold
Can no one hear me scream
Take my life and end this pain
Let me awaken from the dream
This is a stark and poignant look that bursts with the reality of your experience, and elicits my own empathy at the reading. Having lost a good friend, my brother, and my nephew to suicide it also sparks a sympathetic chord to what they must have been going through before the end.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest, I have a very broad sense of poetry that accepts or includes stanzas that could be said border on prose. So I found your list compelling from the standpoint that it took the reader through an imaginative exercise and into your most intimate moments while still leaving much of the detail to the reader to consider, evoking, at the same time, a rush at the observation of this exhibitionistic encounter.
Poetry has never been my strong suit. I have issues with not rhyming. I know there is free style, but to me it seems wrong when I try it, and I get too caught up trying to make it rhyme.
Delete